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Deus

puns

What do you get if you put a duck in a cement mixer? Quacks in the pavement.

41

Deus

animal

What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?

A pouch potato.

62

Deus

puns

Why couldn't the man with no feet drink coffee?

Because he lack toes.

50

DaBoiThicc

pickup lines

Are you a bank loan?

Because you got my interest

38

DaBoiThicc

puns

What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant.

46

Deus

You ever have sex while camping?

It's fucking in tents.

34

PastaMan

puns

You know what they say about cliffhangers...

53

Deus

dark humor

What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison?

A small medium at large.

57

Deus

My mate just told me I don't understand irony at all. Which was ironic because we were at a bus stop at the time.

43

Deus

What did the fish say when it ran into a wall?

Dam.

55

TheOneWhoKnocks

knock knock jokes

Knock Knock 
Who's there? 
Smell Map 
Smell Map who? 
EWWW your fucking disgusting! 

42

Deus

animal

Why did the squirel scream?
Because somebody pinched his nuts

57

PastaMan

puns

Did you hear the joke about the wandering nun? She was a roman catholic.

40

DaBoiThicc

puns

What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!

45

DaBoiThicc

puns

Where does Napoleon keep his armies? In his sleevies.

34

DaBoiThicc

puns

Why do valley girls hang out in odd numbered groups? Because they can't even.

38

PastaMan

puns

What did the scarf say to the hat? You go on ahead, I am going to hang around a bit longer.

48

Deus

news & politics

Thief: Give me your money.

Man: I'm a politician. 

Thief: Then give me my money.

55

Mark14

puns

Why did the girl smear peanut butter on the road? To go with the traffic jam.

47

Deus

puns

The sun doesn't have to go to college.

Because it already has 28 million degrees

52

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