Puns

Just found a video of my daughter on pornhub. 
To make matters worse it sounds like she also has coronovirus as apparently she is a super spreader.

"Pornhub offers free premium service in Italy to ease coronavirus pains". 
Now the hoarding of toilet paper make more sense!

Of course Trump has banned all travel from Europe. 
He thinks germs come from Germany.

If coronavirus isn’t about beer 
Why do I keep hearing about cases of it?

Count Dracula returned a mirror to my shop yesterday

He said it wasn't faulty, he just couldn't see himself using it.

I met Dracula at the pub an hour ago.

He was having a bloody good time.

What does Dracula's torch run on?

Bat-teries.

What is Dracula's favorite fruit?

Neck-tarines

For Halloween I've got a job making plastic Draculas

There's only two of us working here so I have to make every second count.

What happened when Dracula uploaded illegal content to YouTube?

A count suspended.

Have you ever heard about Draculas vegan brother

Count Rucola?

What is the one thing batman and superman don't have to worry about?

Dad Jokes.

You know why Superman would be the best candidate for a management position?

Supervision.

How does Superman stay so fit?

Kal El sthenics

What does Superman put in his drink?

Just ice.

How does Superman get out of risky situations?

He always has an ‘S’ cape

Which city is the South African Superman from?

Cape Town

What's the one currency superman can't hold?

Kryptocurrency.