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Deus

news & politics

if you get rejected because you don't have the required experience DONT WORRY!!!

you can always run for presidency

Kate

Why did the man run around his bed? Because he was trying to catch up on his sleep!

PastaMan

What does an angry pepper do? It gets jalapeño face.

Deus

Why did the electrician get arrested?

Battery

Kate

What did the mountain climber name his son? Cliff.

Kate

Why didn't the number 4 get into the nightclub? Because he is 2 square.

PastaMan

Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

PastaMan

Why couldn't the kid see the pirate movie? Because it was rated arrr!

Deus

What musical instrument is found in the bathroom? A tuba toothpaste.

Kate

What is the leading cause of dry skin? Towels

Deus

What did the rug say to the floor?

I've got you covered.

Deus

Where does the general keep his armies?

In his sleevies.

GoD_139

What do you call a gorilla wearing headphones? Anything you'd like, it can't hear you.

PastaMan

Why did the melons plan a big wedding? Because they cantaloupe!

Deus

What did the buffalo say to his son when he went off to college?

Bison.

DaBoiThicc

Where do you learn to make banana splits? At sundae school.

Deus

How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.

Deus

Hear about the new restaurant called Karma? There’s no menu: You get what you deserve.

Deus

Why didn't the astronaut come home to his wife?

He needed some space.

DaBoiThicc

Call me shrek

Because i’m head ogre heels for you!

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